UK Scientists Discover the World’s Funniest Joke

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In an experiment conducted in Britain (where else do they throw public money by the tonne at such projects?), people around the world were invited to judge jokes on an Internet site as well as contribute their own.

The LaughLab research, carried out by psychologist Dr. Richard Wiseman, from the University of Hertfordshire, attracted more than 40,000 jokes and almost two million ratings.

Okay, since I can hear your heavy breathing from all the way over here, I’ll present, without further ado, the WINNER – The FUNNIEST JOKE IN THE WORLD!:

Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn’t seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, “My friend is dead! What can I do?”. The operator says “Calm down. I can help. First, let’s make sure he’s dead.” There is a silence, then a shot is heard. Back on the phone, the guy says “OK, now what?”

Funny?  Well, I suppose it depends on which hunter you’re asking.

Come on . . .  I KNOW you want to know what the SECOND FUNNIEST JOKE IN THE WORLD IS.

Okay, here it is.

Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson go on a camping trip. After a good dinner, they retire for the night, and go to sleep.
Some hours later, Holmes wakes up and nudges his faithful friend. “Watson, look up at the sky and tell me what you see.””I see millions and millions of stars, Holmes” exclaims Watson.

“And what do you deduce from that?”

Watson ponders for a minute.

“Well, astronomically, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets. Astrologically, I observe that Saturn is in Leo. Horologically, I deduce that the time is approximately a quarter past three. Meteorologically, I suspect that we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. Theologically, I can see that God is all powerful, and that we are a small and insignificant part of the universe. What does it tell you, Holmes?”

And Holmes said: “Watson, you idiot, it means that somebody stole our tent.”

Okay, settle down.  If you want to go to the source, check out laughlab.co.uk – the whackos who dreamed it up.  Or have a look at the Wikipedia article on the subject.

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