A Marriage of Equals – Trevor and Karen

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It would be far too easy for me to make myself the actor in this little scene. And it’s very difficult to avoid the temptation. It’s not often that one gets to be so intimately involved, in such a positive and enduring way, in the lives of one’s closest friends. On Saturday, I was privileged to be the Registered Celebrant at the wedding of Trevor Hattersley and Karen Simmons. Here is the cover of the Wedding Program:

A Marriage of Equals - Trevor and Karen - The Wedding Program

Trevor and Karen chose every word spoken in their wedding ceremony. Trevor said that he had thought about it “for weeks” and came up with a program over which they toiled for perfection for a few days. I much prefer that couples write their own ceremonies. These two did the job perfectly.

Fiona Buffini read The Selfish Giant  by Oscar Wilde. It was wondrous to watch faces progress from puzzlement to comprehension as the story unfolded. It’s a wonderful tale of transformation.  Then I said my little bit to get the show rolling. Trevor and Karen read their identical vows in unison, again speaking their own words. The mixture of laughter and tears during this brief performance was most touching and not a little amusing:

The Wedding Service

The formalities and Signing of the Registry being duly completed, we proceeded eventually to the Cake Cutting:

Wedding of Trevor and Karen - Cutting the "cake"

Pascal’s “Best Man’s Speech” was one of the tamer of those that I have heard. I have to commend Dr. Michon for showing remarkable restraint.

Wedding of Trevor and Karen - Pascal's speech

Here’s a nice shot of Trevor, Karen and Alexander:

Trevor, Karen and Alexander

And, the obligatory Wedding Party Scene:

Wedding of Trevor and Karen - The Wedding Party

Plus the obilgatory bigger wedding party scene:

A Wedding Party Scene - Trevor Hattersley and Karen SimmonsAnd now we get all of the women with Trevor:

Wedding of Trevor and Karen - The Wedding Women with the Groom

And all of the men with Karen:

Wedding of Trevor and Karen - The Wedding Men with the Bride

I can’t say any more. It was Trevor and Karen’s day. What it meant to me to be honoured by them in this way is obvious. To put words to it would be to diminish it.

So, I’ll close by wishing my dear friends all of the happiness that life has brought to me through my marriage.

It should happen for all of us.

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7 Responses to “A Marriage of Equals – Trevor and Karen”

  1. Steve Goodheart Says:

    Simply wonderful! What a dear, moving post, my friend. Though I don’t know any of these people, I was touched by their love and the celebration of that love by their friends.

    May they indeed by happy and know the causes of happiness, and may their years together be long and joyous!

  2. MadDog Says:

    Thanks, Steven. I expect that in many places where there is a small expatriate community and people are separated from their biological families for decades that close friends become surrogate family. In our gatherings we always speak of the group as a family and often use family relationship terms, brother, sister, etc.

    We even have family fights.

    It’s a great comfort.

  3. Steve Goodheart Says:

    What you say totally makes sense, and again, is very touching. I’m so glad for you, your wife, and your friends.

    This kind of isolation can even happen in one’s own home country, when you’ve lost most of your family to death or estrangement. Again and again, I’ve had to find and make surrogate families, and they have been as close and dear and meaningful as biological family ever was (not that biological families can’t be wonderful.)

    What Christian writer Henri Nouwen says is so true: ““When we honestly ask ourselves which person in our lives mean the most to us, we often find that it is those who, instead of giving advice, solutions, or cures, have chosen rather to share our pain and touch our wounds with a warm and tender hand.”

  4. Wencke Says:


  5. More Wedding Pics - Trevor and Karen | Madang - Ples Bilong Mi Says:

    […] Wedding Pics – Trevor and Karen I have a few less formal shots from the wedding of Trevor Hattersley and Karen Simmons last Saturday. I had a great time. I love weddings. […]

  6. Chase Peterson Says:

    isn’t it the happiest moment in our lives when we see the woman we love in a Pure white wedding dress?.`:;

  7. Madeleine Depetris Says:

    I love marriage wishes. I also like the weddings of celebrities. I’m getting married next month. Does anyone know any nice wedding location in Orlando?